Heard any solid jokes in recent times? Jim Pietsch, a true long island urban cabbie, has heard all of them -- from business-people, unemployed workers, Wall road attorneys, prostitutes, writers, travelers, drug purchasers and lovers...all from the again seat of his cab as he makes his means round long island urban. during this follow-up to the generally profitable long island urban Cab Driver's comic story e-book, Jim Pietsch has prepare one other riotously humorous selection of greater than four hundred jokes that's bound to have every body guffawing.
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Extra resources for The New York City Cab Driver's Joke Book
Guy, are you revolting! " The frog seems to be at him and whines, "Fuck you! i have been unwell I" * Q: A: * * What are a Jewish-American princess's first phrases? Gucci, Gucci, Gucci. * * * A instructor declares to her category, ''Children, the scholar who can identify the best guy who ever lived will win this glossy pink apple. •' instantly an Italian boy increases rus band. "Yes, Tony? " 136 "Christopher Columbus! " says Tony. "Well," says the instructor, "Christopher Columbus was once a really nice guy, yet he wasn't the best guy who ever lived. '' at once a bit English woman increases her hand. "Yes, Martha? " "Winston Churchill," says the little lady. "Well, no," says the instructor. "Although Winston Churchill used to be certainly a really nice guy, he wasn't the best who ever lived. " From the again of the room Little Bernie Goldstein increases his hand. "Yes, Bernie? " Bernie stands up and says, "Jesus Christ. " "That is right, Bernie," says the instructor. "Come up and gather your apple. " while Bernie will get as much as front of the room , the instructor arms him the apple. "You be aware of, Bernie," she says, "given the truth that you are Jewish, i am stunned you acknowledged that Jesus used to be the best guy who ever lived. " "Well, actually," says Bernie, "I do imagine Moses used to be the larger guy, yet enterprise is company. " * Q: A: * * What does a puppy do this a guy steps into? Pants. * * * males are out camping out. they're sound asleep of their tent whilst one in all them cries out in ache. the opposite 137 man wakes up simply in time to work out a perilous, toxic snake slithering out of the tent. "That snake simply bit me correct on my cock! " cries the guy. "Huny! Run and speak to a physician to work out what we must always do! " with out a moment's hesitation the opposite guy springs from the tent and runs miles in the course of the woods to a campsite the place there's a pay mobilephone. He calls a physician, and notwithstanding he's absolutely out of breath, he manages, in gasps, to inform the medical professional what has occurred. "What may still I do, document? " he asks. The health care professional says, "Listen rigorously. you need to return for your good friend and with a razor blade lower an X correct instantaneous the place the snake . bit him, then suck out the venom. yet do it quick or your buddy will die! " the guy runs miles again throughout the wooded area and arrives on the tent. His buddy seems to be up anxiously and says, "What did the health care professional say? " the guy tells him, "You're gonna die. " * * * Q: what is a Polish cocktail? A: Perrier and water. • • • males die and arrive in heaven. They stroll as much as St. Peter on the pearly gates and provides him their names. "Gentlemen," says St. Peter, "there appears a moderate challenge. Heaven occurs to be thoroughly complete 138 right now, and i am afraid you will not be ready to are available for a few weeks. " "What? " say the 2 males. "That cannot bel We have been stable all our lives! we must always have the ability to come into heaven without delay! " "Well," says St. Peter, "we'll make it as much as you. You males can return to earth for 2 weeks as whatever you lilce. And while there's room up the following, we are going to come down and get you and you'll come correct in" the 2 males are in contract that this seems an equitable association, and so whilst St.